The San Diego Chicken

When the baseball boys disappoint (and the Padres have truly disappointed their fans this season), what reason is there to go to the ballpark? The answer is easy: when the San Diego Chicken is in the lineup. No matter how excruciating the play-by-play becomes, the Chicken can take away the pain and replace it with laughter. The Chicken kept up the visual antics, parodies, and skits throughout the game where the San Francisco Giants prevailed, 3-2.

How painful was the game? you ask. Here are several low lights.

• Giant fans to the left of me, Giant fans to the right of me, stuck in the middle with you (not you, it’s just the song).
• When the score was tied at 1-1, the Giants scored the go ahead run on a passed ball.
• When the score was tied at 2-2 in the 10th, the Giants scored the go ahead run with our hall of fame-bound closer who really should retire on the mound, trying to preserve the tie.
• In the bottom of the 10th, the Padres get 3 consecutive hits but can’t score. Note to Bud Black: When the game is on the line in the bottom of the 10th and your lead base runner isn’t fast enough to send home from scoring position on a hit, consider putting in a pinch runner. Oh wait! Do the Padres have anyone that could be used in that capacity besides Greg Maddux?

Wait a minute? Why did I name Greg Maddux? How many bases did the San Diego Padres steal in July 2008? The answer is 1. Who stole it? The answer is Maddux. Aaaaaaaah!